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"Founding Fathers" by Jim Priest
As we approach Father’s Day I remain convinced fathers play a critical role in the life of the family. Most importantly, they model what a real man --an honorable man--should be. Having seen such a man up close and personal, sons have an example to follow and daughters have an accurate, real life, picture, of how a good man behaves. Unfortunately, there are males in our society who do not take seriously their roles as father or men; these are the ones constantly auditioning for the old television show "Men behaving badly."
The most notable example of men behaving badly is in the area of domestic violence and sexual abuse. Nearly a third of American women report being sexually abused by a husband or live-in boyfriend and twenty five percent report being raped or assaulted by a current or former partner. Women are three times more likely than men to be killed by their partner and most women who are physically abused live in a home with children who are, themselves, at a greater risk of being abused. Although there are women who beat up men, the overwhelming number of domestic violence and sexual abuse incidents are perpetrated by men. Many of them are fathers.
But some fathers are doing something about domestic violence. "Founding Fathers" is a relatively new national organization of men dedicated to reducing male violence against women and children. Their website, founding-fathers.org, gives information about how men can join the effort. I found out about this group because one of my heroes, Yankee manager Joe Torre, is a founding member. The group has been involved in a campaign to ask Congress to fund violence prevention projects. You can even honor your own dad by enrolling him as a "Founding Father" for $10.00; the organization will provide you a Father’s Day card telling your dad you have so honored him.
Founding Fathers also helps dads talk to their sons about avoiding violence against women and children. Here are some of their suggestions:
*Teach Early. It’s never too soon to talk to a boy about violence. Let him know what is out of bounds.
*Be there. If it comes down to one thing you can do, this is it. Just being with boys is crucial.
*Listen. Hear what he has to say. Listen to how he and his friends talk about girls.
*Bring it up. A kid will never approach you and ask for guidance on how to treat women. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t need it. When it comes time for dating, be sure he knows that treating girls with respect is important.
*Be a Role Model. Fathers, coaches and any man who spends time with boys or teens will have the greatest impact when they "walk the walk." Let him know how you define a healthy relationship and always treat women and girls in a way that your son can admire.
This Father’s Day, Dads can give their families a gift, instead of just receiving one. They can be the role model they were meant to be.
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