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"Preventative Maintenance" by Jim Priest
My dad was a machine repairman at General Electric for more than thirty years. He spent a fair amount of his time doing "crisis repairs"--machinery that stopped functioning at a critical time. But he often told me there would be fewer crisis repairs if he could spend more time doing "preventative maintenance"--tuning up machinery before it broke. Dad performed preventative maintenance by oiling machinery before it got squeaky, tightening bolts before they got loose, and replacing worn parts before they broke down.
I think my dad’s principle of preventative maintenance rings true in relationships. Sometimes our relationships break down like the assembly line did at General Electric. A wife, worn out by neglect, simply walks out on her husband. A child, craving the attention he never received from parents, commits a crime. Friends let little fights go unresolved until open warfare erupts. If only some relational preventative maintenance had taken place, the crisis might have been avoided.
What kind of preventative maintenance should be done in relationships? Let’s look inside Dad’s tool box for some ideas:
Oil the machines before the squeak. Friction between machinery parts causes squeals--a signal that something is going wrong. Relationships have friction too. When that happens, someone usually squeaks. Pay attention to the squeaking and oil your relationship periodically by doing things that reduce friction: spend time together having fun, listen intently to one another, ask questions about things in which the other person is interested. Early oiling prevents later breakdowns.
Tighten bolts before they come loose. Sometimes the vibration of machines causes bolts to loosen. Bolts don’t look especially important but they hold machinery together. That’s why it’s important, from time to time, to inspect and tighten any loose bolts. In the busyness of life, we tend to take certain people or particular aspects of our relationships for granted. Is there someone you’ve been neglecting to spend time with? Have you thanked them for the little everyday things they do? I remember my dad thanked my mom for making dinner nearly every night. My wife often thanks me for going to work each day. These are things, like bolts, we take for granted. Give them some preventative maintenance attention.
Replace worn parts before they break. Often, my dad would disassemble a perfectly functioning machine in order to check for worn parts. Many times he’d find a frayed belt and replace it. It’s the same for relationships. Things may seem to be going along fine in your marriage or friendship, but that doesn’t mean everything is well under the hood. Every once in awhile, check to see if any aspect of your relationship is wearing a little thin. Is something getting frayed from too much repetition or routine? Does your relationship have too little variety? If so, replace it with the spice of life. Change things up a little. Don’t let routine become a rut for your relationship.
People are not machines, of course, and they don’t function like inanimate objects. But preventative maintenance is a worthwhile investment of time in both relationships and mechanics.
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